Still in limbo--waiting for the big "Shift"

Been writing in the weekly messages about how it feels we are in limbo waiting for the world to go through the big shift...after all it is 2012.  We are still waiting but things are now moving.  When I look at the world scene I see currencies changing in ways that we have not seen in a while.  The Euro, which was tanking, is not stablized--out of the blue!  I realize that the IMF has chagned the rules for valuing currencies moving from fiat to equity based.  This is part of a new finacial system that right now includes over 140 countries.  This system will replace the old one and be beneficual to us all.  Iraq is now revaluing, and coming out of Chapter 7 after 10 years.  So this may be the week when everything falls into place.  We will see!

Long overdue update

How amazing that it has been nearly 5 months since I updated this blog.  My how time flies!  I realize that the reason I don't post that often here is that I post via the Weekly Messages.  By the time I get that done every week it just feels redundant to post that same info here.  Still, there are times when something just doesn't fit the weekly message so it gets done here.

Seems I'm at the end of another mission--my second.  The signs (I've learned to look for them) are all around me.  The most significant is that I just feel done with teh weekly messages.  They were my assignment for almost 3 years.  My brother's untimely death also figured into my decision to withdraw for a while...I just felt kicked in the stomach and didn't have the energy to do anything but cry.  Yesterday, the 27th was the 3 month anniversary of his passing.  The pain is still so intense. 

So, I sit in a void...with no idea where to go from here.  Sometimes I get scared because without focusing energy on the business side of this mission, my income has been cut more than half.  I find myself once again winging it on faith that everything will be okay.  I've been through this before. 

I find myself asking my guides, "What's my next step, my next assignment and mission?"  I get no answer.  This is my time to feel, to go inside and allow myself to purge all the pain.  I gotta say I don't find it easy.  I'm a doer.  Still, I know if I just keep putting one foot in front of the other, feeling any fears or other feelings as they come up, not pushing them away, I will find the next door.  I'll get there.

Well meaning people tell me, you need write another book.  Honestly, the thought of doing that is more than i can bear.  That is the last thing I want to do.  Besides, what would I write about?  I feel like I've said it all through teh weekly messages, picking up the story of my second book where it left off and telling it week by week through the messages.  That's better than a book, I think.  But, having said all that, I will remain open to the idea cause it may be my next step...ya just never know!

Oh, I just realized that maybe I need to do an update on Jonathan and I.  I have not fully explored that and many people have asked me about him.  It's a great story.

So, that's it.  I'll sit here at the coffee shop and play a few computer games.  Got this membership with BigFish games and have gotten into playing games...it's fun and my inner child really loves it...especially the time management/strategy games.  My favorite is the Chocolatier series...I've played them all and eagerly await the next one.  I'm gonna buy stock in that company one day.

On a related note, with Elenin's graceful passing, I feel very good about the future.  I feel we are poised to see a shift in this world that will astound everyone.  I don't see the demise of the global economy or catatrophic earth changes and a pole shift caused by Nibiru's imminent passing.  Nibiru's passing will be almost as much of a nonevent as her messenger, Elenin.  I am excited that all of our efforts, our missions and the sacrifices we've made to complete them is finally paying off.  Yep, I see a bright future and I'm not buying into stocking food and preparing for rough times. I put no energy into that thoughtform.  Instead, I'm already planning home improvement projects for 2012 and looking forward to seeing the daffodils, tulips and hyacinth bloom in spring. 

CFS and Fibromyalgia: When the illness is not an excuse.

Been renting 2 of the 3 bedrooms used for workshop clinets to longer term renters.  Made the decision to do so after the economy changed and people stopped traveling as much.  I've been doing the long tern renting for about 2 years and it has gone well for the most part.  Found that after my dad died I no longer want to live alone.

Took on a renter in March that had Fibromyalgia (Fibro).  Having had it myself I felt I could help this person get well much faster thanks to all that I learned through my own healing. Well, I found that that was a mistake.  It wasn't long before the challenges inherent in Fibro and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) began to create tension. The challenges were two fold.  First there was the lack of boundaries and thus the inability to recognize those boundaries for others.  The second was that my new roomie was young (early 20s).  This girl (I'll call her Mary),was in full blown Fibronyalgia. 

Now, I have house agreements that everyone reads before they rent from me. Tney are mostly just common sense agreements such as cleaning up after yourself, turning off lights and locking doors when you leave...nothing out of the ordinary.  There is also an agreement to clear any issue that occurs within 24 hours--not sulking and freezing others out when one is angry.

There's usually a settling in period of about 2 weeks when a new roomie learns how the house is run. Most of the time, I ony have to point out a few things such as what leaving the kitchen as you found it looks like.  Unfortunately Mary's fibro, lack of life experience, combined with a lack of boundaries made this time very difficult.  The result was extreme moodiness, sulking, and passive/agressive actions when she was angry with me. 

Though it bothered me, I was much more concerned by  something else I discovered.  I realized, after running the sales numbers (I work from home) for that first month, that having Mary in my home was costing me  ore than the nominal rent I was charging.  I'll explain.

When we wake up in the morning, we immediately begin making withdrawals from our energy account (an energetic account that we each have that contains the amount of life force we are able to take in each day).  These withdrawals are based on supporting all the things we own and all the relationships we have.  I found myself making a larger than normal withdrawal for Mary each morning because I was constantly on high alert.  High alert is what we experience when we live with someone who is regularly unbalanced either physically, mentally or emotionally. 
I was waking up each day already stressed and concerned about what I was going to have to deal with with Mary and that consumed a big portion of my energy account.  Money flows and grows when there is excess energy in reserve in our energy account...I was overdrawn every single day that Mary lived here. 

As I said, doing the end of the month accounting showed me what I had been feeling and that really hit home.  I had to move Mary out  if I wanted to get my life back in balance.  Fortunately she had already asked to break her lease so that part was easy.  It cost me almost  a months rent and that didn't feel good but, on the other hand, I would have lost a lot more had she stayed. 

Having experienced living with someone with these illnesses gave me a better understanding of what my family went through with me, especially my husband, Jonathan when I was ill.  I wish now I had apologized for the energetic sacrifice they had had to pay for putting up with me.  I also realize now that my behavior, some of which was downright ugly was not excusable, especially the passive/aggressive stuff.  Now I realize that I sometimes made life very difficult and the imbalances in created for them were hard to bear.  Thanks, Mary for showing me this. Lesson learned! 

Bin Laden's Death

Like so many other world events, I watch them unfold while observing my intuitive response.  When I learned of Bin Laden's death, knowing what I know, I felt concerned.  I felt that this is a cover or distraction for something else.  My initial thought was, What shoe will drop?  In other words it feels as though this event is a precursor to something we will dread...yes...that's it.  I feel a sense of dread.  I feel they are going to use this as a way increase security restrictions so that they can completely imprison us.  This may be the way the finally lock the gates on the American people, pulling off what they have failed to be able to do since 9/11.  They, of course, are the Global Elite.  Their intention is to enslave humanity and microchip them to a massive computer.  9/11 was supposed to bring that about but the plan failed becuase Americans didn't respond as expected.  Instead, we reacted with compassion or at least enough to spoil their plan.  We reacted with suspicion, smelling the proverbial rat.  We could not be convinced to begin a war.

Now, I beleive they will use Bin Laden's death and the "threat of retaliation" as an excuse to bring about micro chipping and all other extreme security measures.  We will be forced to live in a police state--now in the open--as Germans did in WWII.  Kiss any remaining illusion of freedom good bye.

Okay, that's my 3D response.  Now, for a higher perspective....stepping into my god self, I see this event and the new security threat and soon to be im posed measures as an accerlation of the Game.  In other words, we've been idling for a while waiting for the Dark to make it's next move.  Now they are moving and rather quickly.  We have less than 2 years to 2012....this move on their part will accelerate the emtional clearing requred to get us to the level needed to create a better world on the other side of our equatorial crossing at the end of 2012.  So, the Dark is once again serving the Light.  Let's get it on!

(2/3) Comet Elenin is orbiting along with Planet X/Nibiru/Brown Dwarf St...

Though the video is a bit rough, the information is wonderful. Explains how Comet Elenin is affecting Earth and how an exact alignment with it along with Nibiru, has occurred on the same days as the earthquakes in Chile, Japan and New Zealand and volcanoes is Hawaii and other areas. What's occurring is that Nibiru's powerful magnetic pull is literally pulling at the tectonic plates around the "ring of fire." You could liken it to a strong magnet pulling on a metal plate causing anything on it's surface to move.

First Galactic Counselor Training in Years!

Something is afoot because I'm training my first potential galactic counselor in a while.  Angela is from Los Angeles, CA.  You could say she was "guided" here by some very powerful Beings for this training.  Seem it is her next step.  Being used to having unexpected directional changes I said, "Okay." 

So far it has been great.  The thought occurred to me this morning to blog about this training...each day Angela and I would write about our expereinces...some of which have been well....amazing!

Day 1 - spent the dragging myself around because I had not had any sleep the night before.  Didn't get to sleep until 4am.  This, we later learned was meant to be.  This training would be far different than the previous ones and I needed to download the info.  That required I be "put  to sleep" during to the day.  Doing so means that I will more easily retain it because being the afternoon, I won't go back to sleep...in which case, some of it could be lost. 

Why they are doing things differently is still is unclear.   The lesson today was about signs.  We marveled at how the Guides brought this lesson about.  I'll let Angela explain it...sooooo amazing.

Angela here -- When I came down for breakfast, I was met by Lucy the Beagle who wanted to talk.  I have recently discovered that animals and I communicate rather freely, though thus far it has mainly been with the furry creatures in my own household.  As I sat with Lucy on the floor, I silently asked her what she liked to do.  I received an image of a squirel and what I thought was a beaver (later to be corrected -- gopher!).  It then came to me to ask her why she doesn't seem to like her new sister, Cleo.  Immediately the reply was that she now has to do things she didn't prior to Cleo's arrival, such as working for her food and having to "wait."

At this point, Jelaila arrived in the kitchen and after confirming Lucy's interest in squirels and gophers, conversation turned to the animals in my household.  Now, let me preface this by saying that I am an only child who was raised in a household with one dog and perhaps an occasional rabbit or goldfish.  I've always liked animals, but never recognized any special connection with them.  Well, now I have five cats and five puppies -- all that have more or less arrived over the past two years.  When the first of these critters began to present themselves in my life, I embraced the idea of having a diversified household...but the numbers began to grow.  Often I'd have just wrapped my head and life around a new four-legged friend, when my Guides began to vigorously direct me to yet another.

I wrestled with old conventions of what it meant in a 3D world to have this many animals and what it could look like to others who don't know me.  The more I let go and accepted that my Guides wouldn't be doing this without a much greater purpose, I was able to relax and embrace the transformation of my home.  I certainly couldn't complain -- the cats (almost all under the age of 1.5 years) are mellow and loving both with me and each other; the dogs (all under the age of one), while needing guidance, are obedient and open...and everyone gets along!

And, while I have been learning life lessons right and left while living with all of these creatures, I, until today, didn't understand the greater picture.  As Jelaila and I spoke this morning, the lightbulb went on in Jelaila's head!  When I arrived at her home yesterday, I had mentioned that I had just been informed that I was part of a collective...and thus there it was, the set-up with all of the signs.  It all fell into place and made my heart soar to final understand!!!  I know this is only the tip of the iceberg, but a wonderful lesson in obedience and trust.

Further note about my discussion with Lucy:  when Jelaila and I parted for a rest a bit later, I was lying on my bed listening to a Tom Kenyon toning track.  Images and messages were passing through my thought, and suddenly there was Lucy wanting to finish our discourse.  I asked her what it would take for her to accept Cleo -- it was to not have to do all the "extra stuff" any longer.  I promised to tell her mom.

A bit later, when reviewing the training manual and Guide agreements, I had a visit from Jelaila's Guide, Devin.  He said it was very important for me to tell Jelaila about my conversation with Lucy.  And so, that's what I did.  I'll let Jelaila finish the lesson....

Waiting for the daffodils--my symbol of hope

Spring is one of my favorite seasons because it symbolizes hope--hope for the future, that the sun will shine and there will be a tomorrow.  Hope for me is symbolized by daffodils...my favorite flower. 

I recall them in my mother's garden as a child.  Each Spring they popped their pretty heads out of the ground, cheerfully turning their bright yellow faces to the sun.  Seeing them out my bedroom window in the morning and after a long day as school, lifted my heart and warmed my soul.  In a time when life seemed so lonely, they were there to remind me that life would and could get better. 

Each spring I eagerly await my little signs of hope, in some ways they seem to me to be a lifeline to happiness and a brighter tomorrow.