Posts
Quadraclear update
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This product seems to work well. Claude no is longer shaking his head but I
clean them daily w the Q tips and apply Quadraclear on my finger. The
soreness ...
13 years ago
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Thanksgiving Thoughts...
It's funny how you can have so many plans for a holiday and then they all fall through. That's okay, having some time alone after a long year of travel is good. Today I'm thinking of the things I am grateful for. What are you thankful for?
Friday, November 5, 2010
Another Lull....where's next year's assignment!
Is it me or are we in another lull...meaning that it appears the energy has stopped the accelerated movement of the past couple of months. Can't help but wonder if it is due to things being in "creation" mode. If that is the case then we must simply be patient and wait for what is being created to manifest. I must confess that I have a hard time with this especially when it involves the whole of the coming year.
If you are like me a starseed/walk-in with a mission, this is the time of year when we receive next year's assignment. I usually have a good idea what is will be by now but not this year. I'm still waiting....how about you?
If you are like me a starseed/walk-in with a mission, this is the time of year when we receive next year's assignment. I usually have a good idea what is will be by now but not this year. I'm still waiting....how about you?
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
HCG Diet Update - October 19, 2010
With at least 6 clients and friends now using the HCG protocol as a result of my blog posts, I thought it would be a good idea to give an update, as well as, share what I've learned.
I've now finished Phase 2 of my second round of HCG. Am down another 5 pounds; not the 10 I had intended to release. So, I wasn't as successful weight loss wise as I was on my first round. The reason--something they don't tell you--is that I hit an emotional wall about 7 days into the round. Within those bloated fat cells we hold emotions....those that caused us to put on the weight in the first place. I hit what seemed like several layers of old pain and was totally surprised. After a few days of consistent cheating on my diet--even with firm resolve not to--I realized my inner child was literally yelling at me. It was as though she was saying, "I'm scared to let go of these layers, Mom! I still need them cause I don't believe you can protect me."
The location of this fat is around my joints--knees, ankles and especially elbows and the backs of my upper arms around my elbows. When I tuned in and talked with Jessie, asking her to show me an image of an event that caused her to store fat on my elbows she responded immediately. I saw myself back in 1992, standing in my apartment racked with emotional pain. I had just come back from the hospital where my then 4 year old daughter had endured a sexual assault exam. As they probed her I felt she was being assaulted all over again. When they were done, I took her home. I had just checked in on her and had walked back into the living room. Looking out as the setting sun from my living room window, I broke down and began sobbing. All the tears, the pain and fear of what had happened to her, to us finally got the best of me. I had had to be strong for my little girl but as I wrapped my arms around myself, I remember so desperately wanting someone to hold me, to be there for me...and there was no one.
Remembering that moment opened the doors, or rather flood gates to other memories, each one revealing yet another moment when I needed someone to be there for me. Needless to say, it was profound.
Afterward, I had other memories surface during the next 12 days. With each one, instead of resisting them as I had done before learning these tools (the Keys of Compassion) I allowed the old feelings to wash over me, assuring my Inner Child that letting the pain come up would serve us better than keeping it down. I let her know that I wanted to let the pain go and no longer needed her to keep it at bay. The release was slow at first, as though she didn't quite trust me and so was only letting up small amounts at a time. I realized that I couldn't expect her to trust me but now I had an opportunity to earn that trust. Each time I felt another wave, I tuned in and talked with her. There were several times I just held myself, seeing myself holding her. Many tears flowed and sometimes days filled with profound, overwhelming sadness passed as we felt each loss, each moment I had felt abandoned when I found myself alone trying to deal with a crises. I realized that the way others treated me was how I had treated my Inner Child. The fact that no one had been there for me when I needed it, was a mirror of who I had not been there for her. I had put others' needs ahead of my own and used energy that my Inner Child needed to keep up healthy on others. How true that the way others treat us is a mirror of how we treat our Inner Children!
Finally the pain was gone and I felt I had come through a 14 day storm. Unfortunately I was near the end of my 23 days of injections and therefore didn't have enough time back on the diet to make a difference. Still, I felt it had been a success because I was able to clear the pain that had caused me to gain the weight. In fact, I was able to pinpoint when I began gaining and developed Chronic Fatigue Syndrome shortly after the crisis explained above.
Having cleared those layers, I've been able to stay within 2 pounds of my final weight. I'm doing good and feel somehow renewed after my clearing. I'll begin after the December Emotional Clearing workshop.
For those of you who are on HCG or contemplating it, keep in mind that if you hit a wall and begin sabotaging yourself, you've simply hit some layers of pain that need to be cleared before your Inner Child will feel safe letting the weight go.
I've now finished Phase 2 of my second round of HCG. Am down another 5 pounds; not the 10 I had intended to release. So, I wasn't as successful weight loss wise as I was on my first round. The reason--something they don't tell you--is that I hit an emotional wall about 7 days into the round. Within those bloated fat cells we hold emotions....those that caused us to put on the weight in the first place. I hit what seemed like several layers of old pain and was totally surprised. After a few days of consistent cheating on my diet--even with firm resolve not to--I realized my inner child was literally yelling at me. It was as though she was saying, "I'm scared to let go of these layers, Mom! I still need them cause I don't believe you can protect me."
The location of this fat is around my joints--knees, ankles and especially elbows and the backs of my upper arms around my elbows. When I tuned in and talked with Jessie, asking her to show me an image of an event that caused her to store fat on my elbows she responded immediately. I saw myself back in 1992, standing in my apartment racked with emotional pain. I had just come back from the hospital where my then 4 year old daughter had endured a sexual assault exam. As they probed her I felt she was being assaulted all over again. When they were done, I took her home. I had just checked in on her and had walked back into the living room. Looking out as the setting sun from my living room window, I broke down and began sobbing. All the tears, the pain and fear of what had happened to her, to us finally got the best of me. I had had to be strong for my little girl but as I wrapped my arms around myself, I remember so desperately wanting someone to hold me, to be there for me...and there was no one.
Remembering that moment opened the doors, or rather flood gates to other memories, each one revealing yet another moment when I needed someone to be there for me. Needless to say, it was profound.
Afterward, I had other memories surface during the next 12 days. With each one, instead of resisting them as I had done before learning these tools (the Keys of Compassion) I allowed the old feelings to wash over me, assuring my Inner Child that letting the pain come up would serve us better than keeping it down. I let her know that I wanted to let the pain go and no longer needed her to keep it at bay. The release was slow at first, as though she didn't quite trust me and so was only letting up small amounts at a time. I realized that I couldn't expect her to trust me but now I had an opportunity to earn that trust. Each time I felt another wave, I tuned in and talked with her. There were several times I just held myself, seeing myself holding her. Many tears flowed and sometimes days filled with profound, overwhelming sadness passed as we felt each loss, each moment I had felt abandoned when I found myself alone trying to deal with a crises. I realized that the way others treated me was how I had treated my Inner Child. The fact that no one had been there for me when I needed it, was a mirror of who I had not been there for her. I had put others' needs ahead of my own and used energy that my Inner Child needed to keep up healthy on others. How true that the way others treat us is a mirror of how we treat our Inner Children!
Finally the pain was gone and I felt I had come through a 14 day storm. Unfortunately I was near the end of my 23 days of injections and therefore didn't have enough time back on the diet to make a difference. Still, I felt it had been a success because I was able to clear the pain that had caused me to gain the weight. In fact, I was able to pinpoint when I began gaining and developed Chronic Fatigue Syndrome shortly after the crisis explained above.
Having cleared those layers, I've been able to stay within 2 pounds of my final weight. I'm doing good and feel somehow renewed after my clearing. I'll begin after the December Emotional Clearing workshop.
For those of you who are on HCG or contemplating it, keep in mind that if you hit a wall and begin sabotaging yourself, you've simply hit some layers of pain that need to be cleared before your Inner Child will feel safe letting the weight go.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Reflections on Project Camelot Interview
It's 7:30 pm and already dark outside as I sit at my favorite coffee shop drinking a cup of joe and reflecting on today's interview. I have to say that I woke this morning with a case of the jitters...I get them before every event that I know the Nibiruans are observing. I can almost feel them peering through the dimensions to observe me....hmmmm...
The interview started a bit late and that was good because I was rushing to complete the final touches on the webpage for the new Emotional Clearing Workshop by Skype and wanted to get that off my list before we began. Kerry was pleasant and I have to say a good host and interviewer. One thing that perplexes me is a show host who asks me a question and then continues talking sometimes answering it him/herself. I just sit there and chuckle to myself. Of course this information tends to make even the most experienced host carry on a bit....at least I've found that to be the case after a decade of interviews.
We covered a lot of ground starting with the usual...how I got started in this work and then moving on to the controversial topic of the Nibiruans themselves. Yep, when she began talking about the Nibs I could feel them moving in to hear every word! Needless to say I chose my words carefully.
Thanks to Kerry's interviewing skills...I was really quite impressed....I was able to explain how the Nibiruans' family name was hijacked by Marduk when he defected from the family to work with the group behind the Global Elite. I knew the Nibiruans want that information to get out and yet they realize that only those who really want to step out of victimhood will do the research to find out what occurred way back when they were on earth. Sometimes I feel it is a hopeless endeavor but I persevere anyway.
The interview went along great until we began talking about Marduk...suddenly we began having communication problems. I could not hear Kerry and thought she nor the audience could hear me. The problem cleared up when we moved on to another topic but not completely. It again kicked into high gear when we returned to the topic of that infamous Nibiruan. Interesting......
The main points the Nibs wanted made were that it is all fine and good to talk about who is doing what, bringing the hidden agendas to light but in the end they are just repeats of ancient conflicts. What matters now is not to play them out to the same conclusion and cost ourselves another planet. They wanted teh listeners to know that we need to focus on teh solution more than anything else. I was able to speak of how that would look (a more organized and concerted effort to create conferences and teleconferences where teh whistleblowers speak first and then when the people are reeling from that info, the "integrators" follow up with what to do with all that anger and hoplessness. I explained that we had gotten to 5D on the previous worlds but never beyond it because when the truth came out the people freaked. Without any tools to integrate the anger, rage, helplessness and hopelness they acted as they had done before, they pulled out their guns and began firing away. The planets were destroyed through scalar warfare.
I was able to explain that compassion was the answer and not only that, the way to move beyond the wars and destruction that will occur on the 3D earth. Like the initiates in ancient Egypt learned when they had to jump into the crocodile pit at Kom Ombo; the way is not to try to kill all the gaters, or swim towards the door they could see with their physical eyes, it was to go inward and swim towards the door they could only see with their 3rd eye. We cannot kill all the Global Elite or put an end to their plans, after all it is their role to play in this ascenion process. The answer it to go within, clear our baggage, end our own inner wars, and tune our frequency up and out of here. We have the perfect opportunity to do it coming in just over 2 years.
I hope the Nibiruans were satisfied with the interview....time will tell, eh?
http://www.projectcamelotportal.com/
interview link: http://data.argusoog.org/radio/2010/ArgusoogRadio-20100910-ProjectCamelot.mp3
The interview started a bit late and that was good because I was rushing to complete the final touches on the webpage for the new Emotional Clearing Workshop by Skype and wanted to get that off my list before we began. Kerry was pleasant and I have to say a good host and interviewer. One thing that perplexes me is a show host who asks me a question and then continues talking sometimes answering it him/herself. I just sit there and chuckle to myself. Of course this information tends to make even the most experienced host carry on a bit....at least I've found that to be the case after a decade of interviews.
We covered a lot of ground starting with the usual...how I got started in this work and then moving on to the controversial topic of the Nibiruans themselves. Yep, when she began talking about the Nibs I could feel them moving in to hear every word! Needless to say I chose my words carefully.
Thanks to Kerry's interviewing skills...I was really quite impressed....I was able to explain how the Nibiruans' family name was hijacked by Marduk when he defected from the family to work with the group behind the Global Elite. I knew the Nibiruans want that information to get out and yet they realize that only those who really want to step out of victimhood will do the research to find out what occurred way back when they were on earth. Sometimes I feel it is a hopeless endeavor but I persevere anyway.
The interview went along great until we began talking about Marduk...suddenly we began having communication problems. I could not hear Kerry and thought she nor the audience could hear me. The problem cleared up when we moved on to another topic but not completely. It again kicked into high gear when we returned to the topic of that infamous Nibiruan. Interesting......
The main points the Nibs wanted made were that it is all fine and good to talk about who is doing what, bringing the hidden agendas to light but in the end they are just repeats of ancient conflicts. What matters now is not to play them out to the same conclusion and cost ourselves another planet. They wanted teh listeners to know that we need to focus on teh solution more than anything else. I was able to speak of how that would look (a more organized and concerted effort to create conferences and teleconferences where teh whistleblowers speak first and then when the people are reeling from that info, the "integrators" follow up with what to do with all that anger and hoplessness. I explained that we had gotten to 5D on the previous worlds but never beyond it because when the truth came out the people freaked. Without any tools to integrate the anger, rage, helplessness and hopelness they acted as they had done before, they pulled out their guns and began firing away. The planets were destroyed through scalar warfare.
I was able to explain that compassion was the answer and not only that, the way to move beyond the wars and destruction that will occur on the 3D earth. Like the initiates in ancient Egypt learned when they had to jump into the crocodile pit at Kom Ombo; the way is not to try to kill all the gaters, or swim towards the door they could see with their physical eyes, it was to go inward and swim towards the door they could only see with their 3rd eye. We cannot kill all the Global Elite or put an end to their plans, after all it is their role to play in this ascenion process. The answer it to go within, clear our baggage, end our own inner wars, and tune our frequency up and out of here. We have the perfect opportunity to do it coming in just over 2 years.
I hope the Nibiruans were satisfied with the interview....time will tell, eh?
http://www.projectcamelotportal.com/
interview link: http://data.argusoog.org/radio/2010/ArgusoogRadio-20100910-ProjectCamelot.mp3
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Emotional Typhoon of the August Full Moon
Woke up this morning feeling like I'd survived a typhoon of emotion. Yesterday was the last day of the full moon and the energy had been building. It's as if it was supercharged and like a huge etheric mixer, dipped its beaters into the pain I had been carrying and was sitting just beneath the surface.
It began with a feeling irritable then as the morning wore on, the energy seem to amp up and my repressed feelings right along with it. By 11am the pain literally engulfed me. Before I knew it I was hitting a chair in my walk-in closet with a shirt, cussing and just...well...felt ready to explode! (I was supposed to be ironing.)
One of the things that was causing me pain was a gut feeling that Gracie, the dog I had rehomed several months ago was not doing well. I had had concerns the night I agreed to let her go because I hadn't checked out the home where she would be living. I had made the decison to let her go to this couple who arrived that evening, driving 40 miles in the pouring rain to see her. They seemed so right...with 2 boys who would be have to give Gracie the play she wanted. And she was really being adopted by the wife who had lost her Dachsund the year before. I like Carey's (her name) energy and felt that she would love Gracie as I did.
So, with teh pain and the concern now at a maximum, I decided to call this couple to check on Gracie and to take a trip to Ottowa, 40 miles south of Kansas City, to visit her. I needed to put my mind and heart at rest about my decision. Long story short, the phone number was no longer any good and the address wasn't eaither. In fact, Roger, the husband, had given me an address at which they had not lived for over a year! Now I was really freaked, my stomach in turmoil as thoughts of Gracie being abused grew and grew in my head. All my feelings of being a bad mom, of not caring enough came rushing to the surface and I just wanted to cry. What had I done to my little Gracie Mai?
You can imagine how the evening went...I sat around feeling traumatized by my feelings. Finally decided to go upstairs to my room...just bought a new little rocker recliner that serves as the place where I mull over things, talk with my guides and do counseling sessions. Eventaully I was able to calm donw and think things through. I called on my soul to help me. "Please help me understand what this is about. Is Gracie really in trouble? if so, you're gonna have to help me find her cause all my efforts failed." (I had even ordered a background check online to find Roger and Carey's latest address but it turned up nothing. I had hit a dead end at every turn.) "If she needs me, send me a sign and a way to find her. I'm letting go now and leaving her in your hands."
this morning I woke up and felt lighter...I felt that Gracie was okay and I had overreacted. the reason was that I did not hold my boundary about checking out the potential adopter's home before agreeing to let Gracie go to that family. Many things had transpired that day that brought me to that point. Suffice it to say that by the time the couple showed up, I was ready to toss my need for extra due diligence to the wind. So the pain was from not knowing where she was and not having done my homework to ensure that I knew. In other words, I didn't take care of myself by ensuring that I could be and remain at peace with my choice of a new family. So, my Inner Child was really pushing that point; she felt I had let her down by not ensureing we knew where Gracie was, and with the help of the full moon's amped up energy, she was able to dial up the pain meter to the point it grabbed my full attention! She certainly accomplished that!
Today, I understand it better. I needed to release that pain...it had been with me since last February when I let Gracie go. Carrying that was not helping her or me and my soul knew that. So she used the energy fo the full moon and my Inner Child's need to express her feelings about it to bring it to the surface for clearing. My friend, Julie said as we talked this morning by phone, "Maybe you are clearing for all mothers." I think she may have a point there. Each time any of us mothers clear our pain around our mothering we help all mothers. Thanks Julie.
It began with a feeling irritable then as the morning wore on, the energy seem to amp up and my repressed feelings right along with it. By 11am the pain literally engulfed me. Before I knew it I was hitting a chair in my walk-in closet with a shirt, cussing and just...well...felt ready to explode! (I was supposed to be ironing.)
So, with teh pain and the concern now at a maximum, I decided to call this couple to check on Gracie and to take a trip to Ottowa, 40 miles south of Kansas City, to visit her. I needed to put my mind and heart at rest about my decision. Long story short, the phone number was no longer any good and the address wasn't eaither. In fact, Roger, the husband, had given me an address at which they had not lived for over a year! Now I was really freaked, my stomach in turmoil as thoughts of Gracie being abused grew and grew in my head. All my feelings of being a bad mom, of not caring enough came rushing to the surface and I just wanted to cry. What had I done to my little Gracie Mai?
You can imagine how the evening went...I sat around feeling traumatized by my feelings. Finally decided to go upstairs to my room...just bought a new little rocker recliner that serves as the place where I mull over things, talk with my guides and do counseling sessions. Eventaully I was able to calm donw and think things through. I called on my soul to help me. "Please help me understand what this is about. Is Gracie really in trouble? if so, you're gonna have to help me find her cause all my efforts failed." (I had even ordered a background check online to find Roger and Carey's latest address but it turned up nothing. I had hit a dead end at every turn.) "If she needs me, send me a sign and a way to find her. I'm letting go now and leaving her in your hands."
this morning I woke up and felt lighter...I felt that Gracie was okay and I had overreacted. the reason was that I did not hold my boundary about checking out the potential adopter's home before agreeing to let Gracie go to that family. Many things had transpired that day that brought me to that point. Suffice it to say that by the time the couple showed up, I was ready to toss my need for extra due diligence to the wind. So the pain was from not knowing where she was and not having done my homework to ensure that I knew. In other words, I didn't take care of myself by ensuring that I could be and remain at peace with my choice of a new family. So, my Inner Child was really pushing that point; she felt I had let her down by not ensureing we knew where Gracie was, and with the help of the full moon's amped up energy, she was able to dial up the pain meter to the point it grabbed my full attention! She certainly accomplished that!
Today, I understand it better. I needed to release that pain...it had been with me since last February when I let Gracie go. Carrying that was not helping her or me and my soul knew that. So she used the energy fo the full moon and my Inner Child's need to express her feelings about it to bring it to the surface for clearing. My friend, Julie said as we talked this morning by phone, "Maybe you are clearing for all mothers." I think she may have a point there. Each time any of us mothers clear our pain around our mothering we help all mothers. Thanks Julie.
Friday, August 20, 2010
A walk down memory lane.
Walking down the hall, I noticed how hard it was not to cry as I peeked into the office suite that had once been mine. I could almost smell the fresh coffee brewing just as it had so many mornings as I walked through the door. Marla, my assistant was already there.
Walking further down the long hall towards the end where the management office for the office suite I orignally had was located, I peeked into the reception room and saw the daycare across the parking lot. it was a La Petite and I chose a one-room office that overlooked it so I could see my then 3 year-old daughter playing in teh playground. Additionally, I could pop in and see how she was doing during the day.
Suddenly the pain of those years and all that was lost washed over me and again I fought back the tears. They were beautiful years but isn't funny how we tend to remember the pain more than the joy? My little girl is all grown up now....
Standing in the elevator as it made its way back to the ground floor, I remembered myself standing there...smartly dressed in a busienss suit with matching high heels, perfectly manicured nails, and briefcase...thinking about the next appointment, wondering if I was going to meet the montly bills. I wanted to be able to travel back in time and talk to that 34 year old version of myself and let her know that she could relax...that everything was going to work out just fine. She would eventually own a house...something I so wanted for Danielle and myself back then. I would tell her that Danielle would be okay and she would grow into a fine young woman. I wanted to tell her that her business was simply the training ground for what she really came to this planet to do. I wanted to tell her that she would indeed leave a legacy...again something I wanted to do even back then.
I got off the elevator, my heart still aching, walked out to my car, got in and drove away.
Coming out of the holding pattern and feeling Jupiter's influence of expansion.
Don't know about you but I feel we are coming out of that holding pattern we were in for awhile...at least to some degree. There's still the question about what next year's assignment will be about but money has begun flowing and I've felt a great need to get things ready for some big push...as though once it begins there won't be time for doing these things. On the business front, I felt I needed to streamline traveling by lightening the load I must schlep around from airport to airport. One suitcase and one carry on that holds my computer and essentials that is easy to carry and can slip onto the handle of my suitcase. On the home front, I'm replacing doors that are so drafty in the winter and having all my windows insulated. I sense it may be a long cold winter.
Fortunately money is flowing again, thansk in part to good ole Juptier and some major emotional clearing. That means paying cash for many of these things. Oh the joys of purchasing a 20 year old home in need of having jsut about everything replaced! I'm glad the energy is supporting anything that can save energy or make money right now.
Fortunately money is flowing again, thansk in part to good ole Juptier and some major emotional clearing. That means paying cash for many of these things. Oh the joys of purchasing a 20 year old home in need of having jsut about everything replaced! I'm glad the energy is supporting anything that can save energy or make money right now.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Two sounds I love in the morning.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
preparing for 2012
preparing for 2012
Hey everyone,
Here's the latest radio interview...this time with Joe Marra He is a great host and good interviewer.
We talked a lot about 2012 and the greater significance of the BP Oil spill. Check it out.
Jelaila
Hey everyone,
Here's the latest radio interview...this time with Joe Marra He is a great host and good interviewer.
We talked a lot about 2012 and the greater significance of the BP Oil spill. Check it out.
Jelaila
Saturday, July 24, 2010
In a Holding Pattern
Was talking about the current energies during lunch with a friend yesterday. It was a relief to know that I'm not the only one experiencing what I can only explain as being in a holding pattern. My friend, Sheri said she felt as if she is waiting for something to happen. "Like waiting for the other shoe to drop type of happening, I asked?" "No, she replied." I had to agree with her...I don't feel any sense of trepidation...just a sense that something is going to occur. Guess you could say, we are in a "void of creation" and in time, we will come out of it and new things will happen...quickly.
What do you think?
PS--to post a comment click on the "comment" link below this message.
What do you think?
PS--to post a comment click on the "comment" link below this message.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
My HCG Journal updated
Thought the previous post was getting a bit long so I'm starting my final entry as a new post. Today I am into day 11 of Phase 2. This is the phase where you increase calories and add more protein, fat and veggies. There's no real limit except that you stay within 2 lbs of your weight on the last day of HCG injections (day 23). I was at 128.6 on day 23. So far I have maintained and that has been with a family reunion weekend! I'm so proud! I just decided that the birthday cakes, hamburger buns and lasagna were not worth the challenges i had faced the last 26 days so I passed them up. Instead, when I felt myself getting a craving for something sweet I turned to apples, cinnamon walnuts and coffee generously laced with heavy cream. That did the trick. Still, I look forward to the day when I can reintroduce good breads...I sure miss them...and certain sugars...I'd love to have a slice of home baked banana nut bread!
Friday, June 4, 2010
My HCG journal
It's funny how once you clear a big block, one in which the dysfunctional belief and subsequent behaviors had impacted your health, the means to restore your health appears. That seems to be happening to me. In the last year I ahve worked to clear my deeply ingrained beliefs about rescuing male partners...in fact, rescuing everyone! So, I manifested the means to begin a fat reduction program that has left 2 of my good friends looking beautifully trim. Not only did they lose weight, they lost more inches than weight...that's unheard of. Additinally instead of the drawn and haggard look one normally sees when rapid weight loss occurs, their skin is soft, firm and dewy. I'm totally amazed. So, I'm starting this process. It's called HCG. and was pioneered by a British doctor named Simeon over 30 years ago. He is also the author of "Pounds and Inches."
I've found the website and book, http://www.hcgdietmadesimple.com/ by Harmony Clearwater Grace, very helpful.
My goal is to blog my journey through my first treatment (26 days), sharing whatever comes up. both about the process and emotional challenges. Perhaps by doing so, someone out there can benefit.
Day 1
This is the first of 3 days in which you take an HCG injection...didn't hurt. You also eat as much as you can...they call it loading...mostly fat filled foods. This is done for 3 days to get one's normal fat stores built up. This will help when the real dietary change takes place (500 calorie limit). I'm told one does not feel hungry even with only 500 calories cause the HCG puts the body in the same state as that of pregnacy. This means the HCG will cause the hypothalamus to release a continuous supply of food into the blood stream. To do that it will only pull from the "abnormal fat" stores rather than the normal fat stores. This will enable a person to burn up all the excess fat that exercise and diet cannot release becuase it is has been made unavailable. The books I mentioned above explain it all.
Even more exciting is that the HCG treatment will heal my hypothalamus which was damaged at some time in my life and then led to my CFS and weight problems. The idea is that at the end of this first treatment (I'll only need 1 cause I only need to lose about 20 lbs....one treatment can cause a person to lose 26 lbs in 26 days) not only will the inches and weight be gone, the hypothalamus will be healed or close to healed. Subsequent treatments will continue that process. That means I'll be able to eat normally again...maybe not as I did as a kid (I at like a horse and was skinny as a rail) but I won't have to bypass the foods I've done without for many years...things that made food and food shopping more of a chore than fun.
I went to Whole Foods and had the best shopping experience in many years. I boughts foods I've not allowed myself to have since my mid 30s. I even bought these tiny cinnamon rolls....just filled with butter and soooo yummy and had a couple with coffee. Sooo decadent! My inner child was jumpin' for joy!
Day 5
Okay, the VLCD (very low calorie diet) appears to be working. No hunger even at just 500 calories a day. Lost 6 lbs so far. Feel great. Noticed the blood sugar swings I used to have are pretty much gone along with the hot flashes. Healing the hypothalamus, which controls the pituitary and thus, blood sugar and temperature is occurring! It is my hope that this eating regimen, along with the HCG hormone will repair the damage that stress and emotional clearing, along with channeling higher dimensional guides have caused. That is one of the reason I am posting this journal here. I realized that after 10 years of channeling, my hypothalamus, which acts as a gateway and translator for incoming messages, gets a bit whacked from having calibrate and downstep a higher incoming message to a lower one. No wonder I gained 20 lbs. Guess I should be grateful that it wasn't more. I've seen what channeling has done to other people's bodies and it isn't pretty.
The emotional clearing also took its toll cause the stress in inherent in the process triggers cortisol the stress hormone. When triggered consistently over a long period of time, we gain weight. I've been through many years of emotinal clearing and it has been consistent!
Day 6
Dropped another 3 lbs. I'm down to 133 lbs. Yippee! I look forward to traveling once a month doing the 2012, Nibiru, DNA and You! workshops now. I was not looking forward to all the travel cause I didn't feel I could sustain the pace....so tired!
One of the things I had requested when asked by the 9D Nibiruans, was to get my body back. I figured that I needed it to be in at least decent condition if I were going to continue this work for several more years. I had been told that I would be rewarded with the things I most desired. So far, that has occurred. I got my daughter back, my health is being restored, have a home of my own...no more renting, and now my body is being restored. I'm gratefully content and okay with the travel.
Day 20
It's been a while since i updated so thought I better get to it. I'm on the final stretch of my 26 days...only 6 more to go. Down to 128 and that's after having plateaued at 129 for 5 days. Traveling seems to do that especially since I had no way to weigh food or myself for that matter. Was in New York for the 2012, Nibiru, DNA and You! workshop. What a great group of people!
Noticed that I'm starting to get hungry cause I'm lagging on the fluids. Found that if I drink at least 1 gallon a day I don't get hungry but I've not done that. So tonight I'm making myself drink three 16 oz glasses. Went to Walmart and bought 4 big plastic cups. Knowing I only have to drink 8 of those seems less daunting that using smaller bottles.
Will see how tomorrow goes. My goal is to get to at least 123. If so, I won't repeat the process...besides I'm really starting to crave my coffee...can't wait till a week from Saturday...that's when I can have coffee with cream again. I'm going to the store Friday night to stock up. Saturday morning will be like Christmas!
One of the things this process has revealed to me is how I handle stress with food. I noticed that I'm more likely to go for a late' than food when I'm stressed. Interesting...
I've found the website and book, http://www.hcgdietmadesimple.com/ by Harmony Clearwater Grace, very helpful.
My goal is to blog my journey through my first treatment (26 days), sharing whatever comes up. both about the process and emotional challenges. Perhaps by doing so, someone out there can benefit.
Day 1
This is the first of 3 days in which you take an HCG injection...didn't hurt. You also eat as much as you can...they call it loading...mostly fat filled foods. This is done for 3 days to get one's normal fat stores built up. This will help when the real dietary change takes place (500 calorie limit). I'm told one does not feel hungry even with only 500 calories cause the HCG puts the body in the same state as that of pregnacy. This means the HCG will cause the hypothalamus to release a continuous supply of food into the blood stream. To do that it will only pull from the "abnormal fat" stores rather than the normal fat stores. This will enable a person to burn up all the excess fat that exercise and diet cannot release becuase it is has been made unavailable. The books I mentioned above explain it all.
Even more exciting is that the HCG treatment will heal my hypothalamus which was damaged at some time in my life and then led to my CFS and weight problems. The idea is that at the end of this first treatment (I'll only need 1 cause I only need to lose about 20 lbs....one treatment can cause a person to lose 26 lbs in 26 days) not only will the inches and weight be gone, the hypothalamus will be healed or close to healed. Subsequent treatments will continue that process. That means I'll be able to eat normally again...maybe not as I did as a kid (I at like a horse and was skinny as a rail) but I won't have to bypass the foods I've done without for many years...things that made food and food shopping more of a chore than fun.
I went to Whole Foods and had the best shopping experience in many years. I boughts foods I've not allowed myself to have since my mid 30s. I even bought these tiny cinnamon rolls....just filled with butter and soooo yummy and had a couple with coffee. Sooo decadent! My inner child was jumpin' for joy!
Day 5
Okay, the VLCD (very low calorie diet) appears to be working. No hunger even at just 500 calories a day. Lost 6 lbs so far. Feel great. Noticed the blood sugar swings I used to have are pretty much gone along with the hot flashes. Healing the hypothalamus, which controls the pituitary and thus, blood sugar and temperature is occurring! It is my hope that this eating regimen, along with the HCG hormone will repair the damage that stress and emotional clearing, along with channeling higher dimensional guides have caused. That is one of the reason I am posting this journal here. I realized that after 10 years of channeling, my hypothalamus, which acts as a gateway and translator for incoming messages, gets a bit whacked from having calibrate and downstep a higher incoming message to a lower one. No wonder I gained 20 lbs. Guess I should be grateful that it wasn't more. I've seen what channeling has done to other people's bodies and it isn't pretty.
The emotional clearing also took its toll cause the stress in inherent in the process triggers cortisol the stress hormone. When triggered consistently over a long period of time, we gain weight. I've been through many years of emotinal clearing and it has been consistent!
Day 6
Dropped another 3 lbs. I'm down to 133 lbs. Yippee! I look forward to traveling once a month doing the 2012, Nibiru, DNA and You! workshops now. I was not looking forward to all the travel cause I didn't feel I could sustain the pace....so tired!
One of the things I had requested when asked by the 9D Nibiruans, was to get my body back. I figured that I needed it to be in at least decent condition if I were going to continue this work for several more years. I had been told that I would be rewarded with the things I most desired. So far, that has occurred. I got my daughter back, my health is being restored, have a home of my own...no more renting, and now my body is being restored. I'm gratefully content and okay with the travel.
Day 20
It's been a while since i updated so thought I better get to it. I'm on the final stretch of my 26 days...only 6 more to go. Down to 128 and that's after having plateaued at 129 for 5 days. Traveling seems to do that especially since I had no way to weigh food or myself for that matter. Was in New York for the 2012, Nibiru, DNA and You! workshop. What a great group of people!
Noticed that I'm starting to get hungry cause I'm lagging on the fluids. Found that if I drink at least 1 gallon a day I don't get hungry but I've not done that. So tonight I'm making myself drink three 16 oz glasses. Went to Walmart and bought 4 big plastic cups. Knowing I only have to drink 8 of those seems less daunting that using smaller bottles.
Will see how tomorrow goes. My goal is to get to at least 123. If so, I won't repeat the process...besides I'm really starting to crave my coffee...can't wait till a week from Saturday...that's when I can have coffee with cream again. I'm going to the store Friday night to stock up. Saturday morning will be like Christmas!
One of the things this process has revealed to me is how I handle stress with food. I noticed that I'm more likely to go for a late' than food when I'm stressed. Interesting...
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Working with my daughter
Danielle, my 22 year old daughter came to work with me a couple of weeks ago. So far it has been very good. We had begun to lose touch; she was in school and working in the evenings at a local restaurant. Losing my father, then my son and. then Jonathan, my former husband and partner through most of the mission (his failing health required that he move back to LA so that his son could take care of him), all in 1 year, were painful reminders of just how fleeting life and relationships can be. I knew I wanted to be close to my daughter but my attempts had been fruitless; she was so busy. When she called one afternoon, crying because her feet hurt so much from being on them for 12 hours a day (she's flat footed), I acted on an impulse and invited her to come to work for me. Much to my surprise, she accepted...and was very excited about it. Yay!
I've been quite impressed with the organization skills that Danielle possesses, especially in light of the fact that her bedroom looks like a tornado mated with a hurricane and had babies in it. Seems that the 5 planets in Capricorn in her natal chart which I knew would make her organized and a good leader finally showed. Not only that, she has shown me a few tricks on the computer thanks to her high school computer training.
What most pleases me is seeing my child two days a week..even if only for a few hours each time. I am taking advantage of these opportunities, not only to provide her with the skills she will need to some day own her own business, but to forge a relationshop that will hopefully heal the final wounds between us and carry us forward.
Danielle's Mother Day gift to me was a little footstool that she hand painted. It's purple with yellow daffodils on it (my favorite flower). I love it! I decided that instead of working that day (he works Tuesdays and Sundays) we would take the day to play. So we went to lunch and the mall for a bit of shopping. In times when joy is hard to find with all the challenges we face, a day with my daughter is even more special.
What most pleases me is seeing my child two days a week..even if only for a few hours each time. I am taking advantage of these opportunities, not only to provide her with the skills she will need to some day own her own business, but to forge a relationshop that will hopefully heal the final wounds between us and carry us forward.
Danielle's Mother Day gift to me was a little footstool that she hand painted. It's purple with yellow daffodils on it (my favorite flower). I love it! I decided that instead of working that day (he works Tuesdays and Sundays) we would take the day to play. So we went to lunch and the mall for a bit of shopping. In times when joy is hard to find with all the challenges we face, a day with my daughter is even more special.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Oh, the wind!
Haven't been here in a while...it's not that things aren't happening...lots is happening...I just didn't have anything to say about them. That is until today. Woke up to a sunny day, high in the low 80s but with strong winds. I don't recall a day in teh last month that we haven't had wind...and lots of it. Today we have gusts around 25 miles/hr....and I noticed that it's making me more on edge. What is it about the wind that does that? Is it that it messes up your hair and gets dust in your eyes, or that it makes talking on your cell phone nearly impossible...tried that today--not good. When I think of how much the wind has blown, the term "solar winds" comes to mind. I wonder if there is a correlation between solar flare activity and these unrelenting winds? Oh well, guess we better get used to them...they may be around a while.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
When Love Finds You
There's a song called "When Love Finds You" by Garth Brooks. Was listening to it today...so perfect for where I find myself right now.
Couple of months ago I wrote about my breakup with a wonderful guy. His name is Steve. I said that we had 80% good in our relationship but the other 20% was in the most important areas; the areas that make up the foundation of any relationship. After what seemed a downward spiral into conflict, I had decided it was best to walk away, and I did--for 2 months. From that point on in late January, I wavered between trying to erase Steve from my heart and asking God, my guides, the universe...everyone...what it was about me that was making it so difficult to be in the relationship.
Seems the universe has a way to ensuring that those who are supposed to be together, find their way back. We live about a mile from each other and I kept seeing his car at least once a week. What's interesting about this is that I had only seen him once in the previous 18 months after he sold me my house. Steve was my realtor...and a very good one, I must say. About a month into our break up, I found myself missing him terribly...I began going to the coffee shop across the parking lot from his office just so I could feel the comfort of knowing he was close by.
Steve and I had begun doing voluteer work before we broke up. We started with the Salvation Army...volunteering was one of the things that really impressed me about Steve. Wouldn't you know it we ended up right next to each other as table coordinators for the SA's "Million Meals for Haiti" event. Once again, it felt so good to be near him even if we didn't connect.
Couple of months ago I wrote about my breakup with a wonderful guy. His name is Steve. I said that we had 80% good in our relationship but the other 20% was in the most important areas; the areas that make up the foundation of any relationship. After what seemed a downward spiral into conflict, I had decided it was best to walk away, and I did--for 2 months. From that point on in late January, I wavered between trying to erase Steve from my heart and asking God, my guides, the universe...everyone...what it was about me that was making it so difficult to be in the relationship.
Seems the universe has a way to ensuring that those who are supposed to be together, find their way back. We live about a mile from each other and I kept seeing his car at least once a week. What's interesting about this is that I had only seen him once in the previous 18 months after he sold me my house. Steve was my realtor...and a very good one, I must say. About a month into our break up, I found myself missing him terribly...I began going to the coffee shop across the parking lot from his office just so I could feel the comfort of knowing he was close by.
Steve and I had begun doing voluteer work before we broke up. We started with the Salvation Army...volunteering was one of the things that really impressed me about Steve. Wouldn't you know it we ended up right next to each other as table coordinators for the SA's "Million Meals for Haiti" event. Once again, it felt so good to be near him even if we didn't connect. After 2 months of asking and looking for the mirror in the things that irritated me, I finally found it, or rather, them. It's interesting how once you recognize your own behavior in that of another, the irritation melts away and love resurfaces in its place. I sent Steve a video message--they are so cool--this past Saturday. I told him how I felt and apologized for my actions. It was frightening...what if he didn't care anymore or was so angry he didn't want to see me again? Fortunately that wasn't the case; we reconciled the next day. When love finds you, it doesn't let go and being forgiving, will allow you to find your way. I'm so grateful that Steve's heart didn't let go of mine.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
4am Training Dreams
Been waking up at around 4am every night for the past month or so. This is not a normal pattern for me. I'd lay awake for about an hour and then drift off to sleep again, waking around 7am. An intensely vivid dream that was both logical and chronoligal would be on my mind as I awoke. After a about a month and having figured out the meaning of several dreams, I realized that they were "training dreams". It's as if my guides are saying, "Pay attention, we are preparing you for a new assignment!" The 4am thing is a wake up call meant to alert me that a traning session is about to begin and then I go back to sleep and have the "training dream". There were a couple of times when I actually heart an alarm go off in my head. The night that the earthquake hit Chile, I heard an alarm that sounded both like a buzzer and a ringer...and it was muffled as if the alarm clock was under a pillow. I also heard a voice say, "Time to wake up!" Strange!
Having been trained to understand dream symbols, I am able to figure out most of them; the challenge is to act on their message.
Anyone else had this?
Having been trained to understand dream symbols, I am able to figure out most of them; the challenge is to act on their message.
Anyone else had this?
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Jake chooses Vienna--why we disapprove
You could almost hear the collective groan from viewers as Jake, this year's bachelor, got down on bended knee and asked Vienna to marry him during the final episode of the TV series, the Bachelor. I simply shook my head in dispair cause though I know she is not right for him in the long term, she is what he must learn from in the shortterm. Unfortunately most of the viewers, unaware soul lessons, did not recognize this and therefore disapproved. Some became vehemently angry. Why would we let soemone else's choice affect us so strongly? I think the answer lies in the fact that we have all made relationship choices that we regret and therefore get angry when we see others headed down the same path, totally disregarding our advice to the contrary. So what's behind it all? Let's take a look.
Jake is very handsome and intelligent 31 year-old pilot who has never been married. Jake has integrity and good family values so what's the problem? In my opinion, Jake has a challenge with commitment. Fear of commitment stems from a belief that we are not good enough to be loved and therefore, once our beloved figures this out, he/she will reject and abandon us. More on that in a moment. Let's look at the two women left standing after weeks of elimination.
Tenley, the viewers' favorite, is a 25-year old dancer who works in college admissions. Bubbly, intelligent and beautiful with integrity and good family values, she is both Jake's intellectual and emotional equal. Having already been married once, Tenley has some life experience so she is more capable of making a marriage work. It was obvious to most of us viewers...and Jake's family that Tenley was the best choice. From a family perspective Tenley was a better fit because her parents are still together and appear to have a solid a relationship as Jake's parents.
On the down side, Tenley hides her dark side and when one does that, his/her lower chakras are shut down. This results in a loss of sexual openness causing a potential mate not to feel sexually attracted. Showing only her light side Tenley seems above reproach. this makes a man feel he can never live up to her standard and never show his dark side for fear of disapproval. This, I believe is the reason that Jake did not choose her.
Vienna was the viewers' least favorite...in fact, many disliked her. Vienna is a young 23 year-old marketing rep. Both immature and something of a drama queen, she is neither Jake's intellectual or emotional equal. Vienna is also bold, aggressive and not afriad to go after what she wants regardless of what others think. These traits both scared and intrigued Jake as he seems a bit shy and timid. After all, he didn't have a single date is high school. Yet her boldness is not born of strength but of a sense of entitlement and insecurity. We know this because she cares not whom she hurts when in pursuit of her desires. When boldness is born of strength there is a sense of respect and consideration for others. Vienna made it clear to the other girls that she was not there for friendship, only for Jake and seemed genuinely surprised that the girls disliked her.
Vienna is very sexy, in fact, she leads with sex...something that attracted Jake because he appears to be little sexually timid. Vienna is also daddy's girl who has been treated like a little princess by her father and expects that to continue. Yet, underneath all her bold, overtly sexual behavior is a young girl with little self-esteem who has been taught that she cannot make it on her own and must have daddy or a daddy figure to take care of her. This dependency along with the sex is what attracted Jake, overcoming his fears of commentment since this girl is more likely to suffocatingly possessive of him than abandon him.
As both Jake and Vienna assert, they are soulmates. I have to agree. What they don't realize is that some soulmates are also lesson mates. This means they are together to learn the same lesson. There are telltale signs that indicate a lesson mate relationship. They are:
intense sexual attraction and passion
codependency and blurred boundaries
loss of individuality and personal identity (where do I end and you begin?)
chronic conflict
So what's the lesson these two soulmates are here to learn? To learn how to love themselves and not give up their individual needs, hopes and dreams when in love. This is not an easy lesson and because it is so challenging there must be something they have in common that is strong enough to keep them together until the lesson in learned. That something is hot, passionate sex.
Such strong sexual attraction effectively blinds both partners to the reality of each other's character flaws. Jake sees a sweet misunderstood girl in Vienna and I beleive he feels her single-minded devotion to him is a clear sign that she loves him. This eases most if not all his fears taht she will abandon him. But, what he fails to consider is Vienna won't tolerate long absences while he flies around the country. Long or consistent absences will cause her fears to take flight--Vienna's insecurites regarding other women--already evident on the show--will play on her mind while she waits for his return. Jake will find himself constantly having to account for his actions in order to assuage his wife's fears of infidelity. This will wear on the realtionship and begin to stifle the passion. Moreover, based on her family pattern of obesity...the fear and resulting frustration will see her turning to food for comfort thus causing her to gain weight..something her family already struggles with.
It's very likely that should Jake make Vienna his wife, her fears and drama a becoming tiring for his family they will begin to back away. This will only lead to alienation of Jack from his family as Vienna, sensing her in-laws disapproval, will begin to demand his loyalty. Now in the middle between his wife and his family, Jake may begin to think that he has paid too high a price. At that point he will have to make a painful decision...to love himself enough to let go, or give in and choose between his wife and his family. It is at this point when work or some addition will become the means to escape the pain. The passion that drew them together will become buried under layers of anger, pain and Jake's growing feelings of resentment and being suffocated.
If Jake realizes the lesson, to stay committed to himself, his values, goals, dreams and boundaries when in love with another, he will realize that Vienna is not right for him. He will be grateful to Vienna though, and thankful that, as a soul, she loved him enough to show him how his Inner child felt about him when Jake was in a relationship. Vienna will be acting out the feelings and behavior of Jake's Inner Child. At that point he will lovingly let go and be ready to move on to a woman much like Tenley, but one who is in touch with her Dark side so that the sexual attraction will be there too. The sex won't be as intense but it will be a healthy attraction, one that enables both partners to maintain their boundaries and personal integrity in the relationship. It is at this point that Jake will know real love...because he now knows self-love.
On the other hand, this couple could turn things around if both get the lesson, learn to love themselves, reclaiming their individuality and setting healthy boundaries. Vienna would have to grow up and learn to parent herself which means becoming her own daddy and learning to achieve her desires with respect for others. Jake would have to risk her anger and feel the pain of allowng her to suffer the consequences of her actions. If she does and she stays, Vienna and Jake could have the relationship we all want.
Jake is very handsome and intelligent 31 year-old pilot who has never been married. Jake has integrity and good family values so what's the problem? In my opinion, Jake has a challenge with commitment. Fear of commitment stems from a belief that we are not good enough to be loved and therefore, once our beloved figures this out, he/she will reject and abandon us. More on that in a moment. Let's look at the two women left standing after weeks of elimination.
Tenley, the viewers' favorite, is a 25-year old dancer who works in college admissions. Bubbly, intelligent and beautiful with integrity and good family values, she is both Jake's intellectual and emotional equal. Having already been married once, Tenley has some life experience so she is more capable of making a marriage work. It was obvious to most of us viewers...and Jake's family that Tenley was the best choice. From a family perspective Tenley was a better fit because her parents are still together and appear to have a solid a relationship as Jake's parents.
On the down side, Tenley hides her dark side and when one does that, his/her lower chakras are shut down. This results in a loss of sexual openness causing a potential mate not to feel sexually attracted. Showing only her light side Tenley seems above reproach. this makes a man feel he can never live up to her standard and never show his dark side for fear of disapproval. This, I believe is the reason that Jake did not choose her.
Vienna was the viewers' least favorite...in fact, many disliked her. Vienna is a young 23 year-old marketing rep. Both immature and something of a drama queen, she is neither Jake's intellectual or emotional equal. Vienna is also bold, aggressive and not afriad to go after what she wants regardless of what others think. These traits both scared and intrigued Jake as he seems a bit shy and timid. After all, he didn't have a single date is high school. Yet her boldness is not born of strength but of a sense of entitlement and insecurity. We know this because she cares not whom she hurts when in pursuit of her desires. When boldness is born of strength there is a sense of respect and consideration for others. Vienna made it clear to the other girls that she was not there for friendship, only for Jake and seemed genuinely surprised that the girls disliked her.
Vienna is very sexy, in fact, she leads with sex...something that attracted Jake because he appears to be little sexually timid. Vienna is also daddy's girl who has been treated like a little princess by her father and expects that to continue. Yet, underneath all her bold, overtly sexual behavior is a young girl with little self-esteem who has been taught that she cannot make it on her own and must have daddy or a daddy figure to take care of her. This dependency along with the sex is what attracted Jake, overcoming his fears of commentment since this girl is more likely to suffocatingly possessive of him than abandon him.
As both Jake and Vienna assert, they are soulmates. I have to agree. What they don't realize is that some soulmates are also lesson mates. This means they are together to learn the same lesson. There are telltale signs that indicate a lesson mate relationship. They are:
intense sexual attraction and passion
codependency and blurred boundaries
loss of individuality and personal identity (where do I end and you begin?)
chronic conflict
So what's the lesson these two soulmates are here to learn? To learn how to love themselves and not give up their individual needs, hopes and dreams when in love. This is not an easy lesson and because it is so challenging there must be something they have in common that is strong enough to keep them together until the lesson in learned. That something is hot, passionate sex.
Such strong sexual attraction effectively blinds both partners to the reality of each other's character flaws. Jake sees a sweet misunderstood girl in Vienna and I beleive he feels her single-minded devotion to him is a clear sign that she loves him. This eases most if not all his fears taht she will abandon him. But, what he fails to consider is Vienna won't tolerate long absences while he flies around the country. Long or consistent absences will cause her fears to take flight--Vienna's insecurites regarding other women--already evident on the show--will play on her mind while she waits for his return. Jake will find himself constantly having to account for his actions in order to assuage his wife's fears of infidelity. This will wear on the realtionship and begin to stifle the passion. Moreover, based on her family pattern of obesity...the fear and resulting frustration will see her turning to food for comfort thus causing her to gain weight..something her family already struggles with.
It's very likely that should Jake make Vienna his wife, her fears and drama a becoming tiring for his family they will begin to back away. This will only lead to alienation of Jack from his family as Vienna, sensing her in-laws disapproval, will begin to demand his loyalty. Now in the middle between his wife and his family, Jake may begin to think that he has paid too high a price. At that point he will have to make a painful decision...to love himself enough to let go, or give in and choose between his wife and his family. It is at this point when work or some addition will become the means to escape the pain. The passion that drew them together will become buried under layers of anger, pain and Jake's growing feelings of resentment and being suffocated.
If Jake realizes the lesson, to stay committed to himself, his values, goals, dreams and boundaries when in love with another, he will realize that Vienna is not right for him. He will be grateful to Vienna though, and thankful that, as a soul, she loved him enough to show him how his Inner child felt about him when Jake was in a relationship. Vienna will be acting out the feelings and behavior of Jake's Inner Child. At that point he will lovingly let go and be ready to move on to a woman much like Tenley, but one who is in touch with her Dark side so that the sexual attraction will be there too. The sex won't be as intense but it will be a healthy attraction, one that enables both partners to maintain their boundaries and personal integrity in the relationship. It is at this point that Jake will know real love...because he now knows self-love.
On the other hand, this couple could turn things around if both get the lesson, learn to love themselves, reclaiming their individuality and setting healthy boundaries. Vienna would have to grow up and learn to parent herself which means becoming her own daddy and learning to achieve her desires with respect for others. Jake would have to risk her anger and feel the pain of allowng her to suffer the consequences of her actions. If she does and she stays, Vienna and Jake could have the relationship we all want.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Dogs
I'm into dogs...I'm into cats, too but I've become a dog lover since having obtained one back in 2005. I've had them before but never really understood what it meant to be a dog lover and owner until 2005. From the moment I brought my new puppy home...a small beagle I named Gracie Mai, I made just about every mistake you can make.
Needless to say that my little pup went from balanced to a mess in just a few short weeks. Too much cuddle time, we treated her like a baby, and too lap time turned her into an anxious, stressed out and fearful little girl. It was only when I discovered Cesar Milan, the dog whisperer, did I get a clue as to how to rehabilitate her and train myself! It took about 2 months of patience, love, discipline...for both of us, as consistency but my daughter and I managed to resolve most of her seperation anxiety. She was peeing and pooping her in crate and screaming/barking/whining for hours!
We got her neice, Lucy Bell 8 months later...we didn't make the same mistakes.
Since then I've found someone else whom I feel is very sharp when it comes to dogs, Earl Newland...the dog shaman. He is a behaviorist more than a traininer and raises American Tundra Shepards...these dogs are only 1 or 2 crosses away from a wolf. You have to be a strong pack leader for them or they will "eat your lunch." Earl's latest blog post on dog parks echos my thoughts exactly. I found them a hazardous place for small dogs especially as people and dogs run up to and harass them. I've seen numerous small dogs...and big ones, ganged up on by bigger dogs too full of energy and therefore unbalanced. I highly recommend reading his info.
We got her neice, Lucy Bell 8 months later...we didn't make the same mistakes.
Since then I've found someone else whom I feel is very sharp when it comes to dogs, Earl Newland...the dog shaman. He is a behaviorist more than a traininer and raises American Tundra Shepards...these dogs are only 1 or 2 crosses away from a wolf. You have to be a strong pack leader for them or they will "eat your lunch." Earl's latest blog post on dog parks echos my thoughts exactly. I found them a hazardous place for small dogs especially as people and dogs run up to and harass them. I've seen numerous small dogs...and big ones, ganged up on by bigger dogs too full of energy and therefore unbalanced. I highly recommend reading his info.
No sleep but plenty of energy.
NIght before last, Feb. 24th, I barely slept. I wasn't awake worrying or anything, I just found I couldn't sleep. Kept looking at the clock waiting for daybreak. Almost got up around 4:30am but thought I'd be dragging by the afternoon if I did. Finally got up at 6:30. Had plenty of energy throughout the day. That was unusual. I normally have to take a nap in the afternoon if I don't sleep the night before. Wonder what's going on? Didn't feel I was downloading or anything...just wired.
Yesterday a trainer was killed by a killer whale...right in front of a crowd! A client sent me the url to Stuart Swerdlow's website. http://expansions.com/News.cfm Stewart is saying that there was a bombardment of ELF waves over North America yesterday heightening feelings of depression and anger. If so, that could trigger an already agitated killer whale. I didn't feel any anger yesterday...or today but I did notice feeling a bit anxious...had to calm myself with soothing music and some yoga. Anyone feel anything?
Yesterday a trainer was killed by a killer whale...right in front of a crowd! A client sent me the url to Stuart Swerdlow's website. http://expansions.com/News.cfm Stewart is saying that there was a bombardment of ELF waves over North America yesterday heightening feelings of depression and anger. If so, that could trigger an already agitated killer whale. I didn't feel any anger yesterday...or today but I did notice feeling a bit anxious...had to calm myself with soothing music and some yoga. Anyone feel anything?
Monday, February 22, 2010
Stillness - the aftermath of activity
I'm sitting here at my favorite coffee shop on a Friday afternoon. It was the first sunny day in a while and after being in the house working, I felt I needed to be out and around others. Funny how that works sometimes...we just need human interaction. Black Dog, the name of the coffee shop, draws an eclectic blend of customers. There are college students, young professionals, older professionals and the terminally confused about who they are. I must say, I find it a great place to people watch; one of my favorite pasttimes.
So, another reason I'm here is that I'm having one of those days when I don't want to do anything cause it feels like everything is still--as though waiting for something to form and take off. It's been that way since I returned from the Conscious Life Expo. I had been told that that expo would determine what happens next. And though I've been through this before, back in 2003 again, right after the Conscious Life Expo, the stillness is still unnerving at times. It triggers the fear that nothing will transpire even though something always has. After all these years, I still find it hard to be still and wait. Patience is something I have had to work at...very diligently!
Seems I'm not alone in the stillness...many others are there with me. We are waiting, waiting for the next step to materialize. I can just imagine all the guides busy connecting with each other, having meetings, discussing plans, many that will come to fruition a year or more in the future. When I think back to all the amazing synchronicities I've experienced, and all the events that transpired, and the wonderful people who just so happened to show up at just the right time, I find it easier to be patient. Experiences like those are easy to wait for. I've got to remind myself to think of those when I find my patience wearing thin.
So where are you? In a period of activity or are you in the stillness with me, waiting for our guides to prepare the next step?
So, another reason I'm here is that I'm having one of those days when I don't want to do anything cause it feels like everything is still--as though waiting for something to form and take off. It's been that way since I returned from the Conscious Life Expo. I had been told that that expo would determine what happens next. And though I've been through this before, back in 2003 again, right after the Conscious Life Expo, the stillness is still unnerving at times. It triggers the fear that nothing will transpire even though something always has. After all these years, I still find it hard to be still and wait. Patience is something I have had to work at...very diligently!
Seems I'm not alone in the stillness...many others are there with me. We are waiting, waiting for the next step to materialize. I can just imagine all the guides busy connecting with each other, having meetings, discussing plans, many that will come to fruition a year or more in the future. When I think back to all the amazing synchronicities I've experienced, and all the events that transpired, and the wonderful people who just so happened to show up at just the right time, I find it easier to be patient. Experiences like those are easy to wait for. I've got to remind myself to think of those when I find my patience wearing thin.
So where are you? In a period of activity or are you in the stillness with me, waiting for our guides to prepare the next step?
Thursday, February 18, 2010
2010 Conscious Life Expo in Los Angeles, CA
The 2010 Conscious Life Expo was wonderful and well attended. I don't know what the actual count was but it had to be around 10,000. Perhaps it was the line up of notable speakers that drew so many people. There was Zecharia Sitchin, Gregg Braden, Debbie Ford, Richard Hoagland, Dannion Brinkley, David Wilcock, Jean Houston and a host of others.
The energy of this expo was very high and the beautiful setting...the Hilton, which had been feng shuied--loved the crystals hanging from the chandelier above the foyer--only added to the feeling. Of course, the wonderful sunny and warm southern California weather helped as well...especially for those of us from snowy areas.
It appears that the two main focuses for this conference were 2012 and Nibiru. People seemed genuinely concerned about 2012 and what part Nibiru would play.
I began the conference with seemed to me to be a good omen. I was at the buffet table for lunch on Friday when lo and behold Shirley McClaine walked up. My 2.5 years living in LA had taught me to act cool and polite and not talk to or stare....it was hard though. She was only a foot away from me! When I turned to go back to my table, I walked right past none other than Zecharia Sitichin making his way, albeit very slowly--he's around 90 years old--to the salad table. OMG! They were having lunch together. Isn't that something I thought....Shirley, the woman who had played such an instrumental role in the awakening of so many people including me, was learning about Nibiru! Gave me a warm feeling.
I had a lecture and 2 workshops this time, along with a seat on the 2012 Panel. The panel came first, followed shortly after by the lecture and 1 of 2 workshops; all of them on Saturday. Oh, I have to tell you about that. This panel was hosted by George Noory of Coast to Coast fame. Panelist were David Wilcock, Dannion Brinkley, Sean David Morton, David Childress, John Hogue, Christian Von Lahr and Richard Hoagland. I was the only female. There was a mix up about the panels--I was mistakenly placed on the Prophecy Panel instead of this one so it came as a surprise ot the men when I walked up and introduced myself before we all took our places at the table. I have to admit to having more than a few jitters, after all I was in the company of some big names in the industry.
With 8 panelist and some of them rather long-winded we only got through 2 questions about 2012. The first was, what will happen in 2012? The second was, will there be earth changes in 2012. I answered the first one but after taking about an hour for the men to answer the second one, George Noory, the panel host went straight to questions. I was okay with that because I felt that being the newbie in this group, less is more.
Fortunately 2 of the 4 audience questions were for me. The second question was most relevant because I was able to explain my take on how movies are used to help train us to remember our collective galactic past along with how to make different choices for our future. I went through the Matrix, the Terminator series and then the movie Avatar. As I explained, the Matrix series was given to show us that we ended up caught in frequency fences, the Terminator series showed us what occurred when we created artificial intelligence that could outlive, out work and outthink us and how we handled it in the past. And the Avatar movie was given to us to show us our potential future, a future we could choose if we embraced compassion. The audience seemed to really get it...I was relieved.
Here's the link a clip from the panel discussion where I talk about the movies and the significance of Avatar: http://sharing.theflip.com/session/3b96764faf09bbb4b4c8e3b8d1a58c9c/video/10704822
My thoughts about some of the men...Richard Hoagland sat on my left. He is what I would call...gallant. I really liked him. Sean David Morton was interesting...a bit intense. He took several hits from the other guys during the panel..as a result of his sometimes outrageous behavior--the one that immediately comes to mind is when he stood up and blew into a conch shell then told the audience that he had to blow his own horn since no one else would. Then, he asked the audience indulge him for about 45 seconds while he gave his credentials, a list of predictions that did come true...it took about 5 minutes! Sean speaks very fast and it wasn't long before the audience was on overload.
David Wilcock was introduced next and instead of speaking of himself, he took the audience into a few moments of meditation to calm them down. I have to say it was an excellent move and one that was greatly needed. Subsequently Sean was the recipient of several barbs from the other men; don't think he was very happy about that. I really felt for him after a few of them, especially the one where David Childress jokingly said he'd like to see a list of all Sean's predictions that didn't come true.
David Wilcock tried to turn it into a panel discussion but didn't get very far. I really like David...we seem to have a warm connection and his girlfriend Aurora is such a lovely woman. I think that David and I click because we both intuitively sense the challenges each faces in putting ourselves out there as we do.
Dannion was in fine form keeping the audience laughing with his jokes about wanting to drive a spaceship. I always enjoy hearing him speak cause I know I'll walk away in a good mood. All joking aside, Dannion has a sweet side and his feelings are deep and evident when he talks of his hospice organization which I think is called, Twilight Brigade. Having died more than once he knows what awaits us and offering comfort to dying veterans is one way to assure them that the end is simply another beginning.
David Childress, who sat to my right was pretty hot...I really liked his energy....nuff said.
I had about an hour before my lecture, The Mystery of Nibiru Revealed. I had already braced myself for the possibility that no one would attend because I was scheduled at the same time as Zecharia Sitchin.
There are moments in life that remain with us forever....I had one of those moments when I walked into the lecture room to find a packed. There were folks crowded into the back of the room, sitting in the aisle and on the floor around the stage. I had about 3 feet to walk in before I risked stepping on someone's hand or foot. What's funny is that as I was flying down the hall looking for my lecture room, I had glanced into that room and thought to myself...boy that must be a very interesting speaker cause they have a packed room. What a surprise when my friend Michael Alpough grabbed my arm to pull be back saying, "Jelaila, that's your room, girl!"
I gingerly picked my way to the front trying not to step on any fingers or toes. As I stood there waiting fore everyone to settle down, I felt awed and humbled. I spoke of Nibiru and why the Nibiruans chose to disconnect our 10 DNA strands. The questions were flying and before long it was over. Michael shot some footage of the crowd. I hope to be able to get it and put it up for you to see.
We had a full house for the workshop on DNA Recoding and Psychic Ability even though I was again up against Zecharia Sitchin. Guess it was time for the Nibiruans' and their perspective to be heard, eh? This workshop went very well and there is a video of it for sale on the Expo site at: http://www.consciouslifeexpo.com/
All in all it was a great conference and I felt that whatever the Nibirauns wanted to see occur, did so. I was told that a lot depended on how it went and the connections made. Holding my own on the 2012 panel and even recieving a compliment from George Noory and a warm handshake from Richard Hoagland seemed to be 2 of the connections that were needed.
My heartfelt thanks to three people who helped make this expo experience so wonderful. Julie Dickey, Michael Alpough and Gary Thompson. Julie flew from Austin to help me in the booth. Julie kept me grounded and was a workout pal. We spent happy moments drinking coffee each morning, sitting in the balcony overlooking the foyer at the Hilton. Michael was my fun sponsor, ensuring that I remembered to have fun. He was also my cameraman and like Julie an all around go to person. Using his new Flip camera, Michael was able to capture footage and get people's testamonials. He was also there to carry heavy boxes and just do whatever it took to make things go smoothly. I'd love to be able to have both he and Julie with me wherever this work takes me.
Gary was there to help man the booth and I am so grateful for that. He wrote his own book and was proudly selling it. I was happy to be able to support him by giving him space in the booth. I really admired the way he would answer people's questions with enthusiasm no matter how tired he was.
So here I sit on Thursday morning. I am still not sure what will come of it all and that's okay--I feel it is forming. And just as back in 2003 when I reached the previous level--again at this expo--the next step will show itself. Right now I'm just going to focus on what has become on the mainstays of this work--another Emotional Clearing workshop. It will be here at my house in late March.
I feel that there were many others at the conference who felt it was going to be pivotal to their next step. Like me they too will carry on with what they have been doing until that next step shows itself. As David Childress reminded us during the 2012 Panel, before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water; after enlightenment chop wood, carry water.
The energy of this expo was very high and the beautiful setting...the Hilton, which had been feng shuied--loved the crystals hanging from the chandelier above the foyer--only added to the feeling. Of course, the wonderful sunny and warm southern California weather helped as well...especially for those of us from snowy areas.
It appears that the two main focuses for this conference were 2012 and Nibiru. People seemed genuinely concerned about 2012 and what part Nibiru would play.
I began the conference with seemed to me to be a good omen. I was at the buffet table for lunch on Friday when lo and behold Shirley McClaine walked up. My 2.5 years living in LA had taught me to act cool and polite and not talk to or stare....it was hard though. She was only a foot away from me! When I turned to go back to my table, I walked right past none other than Zecharia Sitichin making his way, albeit very slowly--he's around 90 years old--to the salad table. OMG! They were having lunch together. Isn't that something I thought....Shirley, the woman who had played such an instrumental role in the awakening of so many people including me, was learning about Nibiru! Gave me a warm feeling.
I had a lecture and 2 workshops this time, along with a seat on the 2012 Panel. The panel came first, followed shortly after by the lecture and 1 of 2 workshops; all of them on Saturday. Oh, I have to tell you about that. This panel was hosted by George Noory of Coast to Coast fame. Panelist were David Wilcock, Dannion Brinkley, Sean David Morton, David Childress, John Hogue, Christian Von Lahr and Richard Hoagland. I was the only female. There was a mix up about the panels--I was mistakenly placed on the Prophecy Panel instead of this one so it came as a surprise ot the men when I walked up and introduced myself before we all took our places at the table. I have to admit to having more than a few jitters, after all I was in the company of some big names in the industry.
With 8 panelist and some of them rather long-winded we only got through 2 questions about 2012. The first was, what will happen in 2012? The second was, will there be earth changes in 2012. I answered the first one but after taking about an hour for the men to answer the second one, George Noory, the panel host went straight to questions. I was okay with that because I felt that being the newbie in this group, less is more.
Fortunately 2 of the 4 audience questions were for me. The second question was most relevant because I was able to explain my take on how movies are used to help train us to remember our collective galactic past along with how to make different choices for our future. I went through the Matrix, the Terminator series and then the movie Avatar. As I explained, the Matrix series was given to show us that we ended up caught in frequency fences, the Terminator series showed us what occurred when we created artificial intelligence that could outlive, out work and outthink us and how we handled it in the past. And the Avatar movie was given to us to show us our potential future, a future we could choose if we embraced compassion. The audience seemed to really get it...I was relieved.
Here's the link a clip from the panel discussion where I talk about the movies and the significance of Avatar: http://sharing.theflip.com/session/3b96764faf09bbb4b4c8e3b8d1a58c9c/video/10704822
My thoughts about some of the men...Richard Hoagland sat on my left. He is what I would call...gallant. I really liked him. Sean David Morton was interesting...a bit intense. He took several hits from the other guys during the panel..as a result of his sometimes outrageous behavior--the one that immediately comes to mind is when he stood up and blew into a conch shell then told the audience that he had to blow his own horn since no one else would. Then, he asked the audience indulge him for about 45 seconds while he gave his credentials, a list of predictions that did come true...it took about 5 minutes! Sean speaks very fast and it wasn't long before the audience was on overload.
David Wilcock was introduced next and instead of speaking of himself, he took the audience into a few moments of meditation to calm them down. I have to say it was an excellent move and one that was greatly needed. Subsequently Sean was the recipient of several barbs from the other men; don't think he was very happy about that. I really felt for him after a few of them, especially the one where David Childress jokingly said he'd like to see a list of all Sean's predictions that didn't come true.
David Wilcock tried to turn it into a panel discussion but didn't get very far. I really like David...we seem to have a warm connection and his girlfriend Aurora is such a lovely woman. I think that David and I click because we both intuitively sense the challenges each faces in putting ourselves out there as we do.
Dannion was in fine form keeping the audience laughing with his jokes about wanting to drive a spaceship. I always enjoy hearing him speak cause I know I'll walk away in a good mood. All joking aside, Dannion has a sweet side and his feelings are deep and evident when he talks of his hospice organization which I think is called, Twilight Brigade. Having died more than once he knows what awaits us and offering comfort to dying veterans is one way to assure them that the end is simply another beginning.
David Childress, who sat to my right was pretty hot...I really liked his energy....nuff said.
I had about an hour before my lecture, The Mystery of Nibiru Revealed. I had already braced myself for the possibility that no one would attend because I was scheduled at the same time as Zecharia Sitchin.
There are moments in life that remain with us forever....I had one of those moments when I walked into the lecture room to find a packed. There were folks crowded into the back of the room, sitting in the aisle and on the floor around the stage. I had about 3 feet to walk in before I risked stepping on someone's hand or foot. What's funny is that as I was flying down the hall looking for my lecture room, I had glanced into that room and thought to myself...boy that must be a very interesting speaker cause they have a packed room. What a surprise when my friend Michael Alpough grabbed my arm to pull be back saying, "Jelaila, that's your room, girl!"
I gingerly picked my way to the front trying not to step on any fingers or toes. As I stood there waiting fore everyone to settle down, I felt awed and humbled. I spoke of Nibiru and why the Nibiruans chose to disconnect our 10 DNA strands. The questions were flying and before long it was over. Michael shot some footage of the crowd. I hope to be able to get it and put it up for you to see.
We had a full house for the workshop on DNA Recoding and Psychic Ability even though I was again up against Zecharia Sitchin. Guess it was time for the Nibiruans' and their perspective to be heard, eh? This workshop went very well and there is a video of it for sale on the Expo site at: http://www.consciouslifeexpo.com/
All in all it was a great conference and I felt that whatever the Nibirauns wanted to see occur, did so. I was told that a lot depended on how it went and the connections made. Holding my own on the 2012 panel and even recieving a compliment from George Noory and a warm handshake from Richard Hoagland seemed to be 2 of the connections that were needed.
My heartfelt thanks to three people who helped make this expo experience so wonderful. Julie Dickey, Michael Alpough and Gary Thompson. Julie flew from Austin to help me in the booth. Julie kept me grounded and was a workout pal. We spent happy moments drinking coffee each morning, sitting in the balcony overlooking the foyer at the Hilton. Michael was my fun sponsor, ensuring that I remembered to have fun. He was also my cameraman and like Julie an all around go to person. Using his new Flip camera, Michael was able to capture footage and get people's testamonials. He was also there to carry heavy boxes and just do whatever it took to make things go smoothly. I'd love to be able to have both he and Julie with me wherever this work takes me.
Gary was there to help man the booth and I am so grateful for that. He wrote his own book and was proudly selling it. I was happy to be able to support him by giving him space in the booth. I really admired the way he would answer people's questions with enthusiasm no matter how tired he was.
So here I sit on Thursday morning. I am still not sure what will come of it all and that's okay--I feel it is forming. And just as back in 2003 when I reached the previous level--again at this expo--the next step will show itself. Right now I'm just going to focus on what has become on the mainstays of this work--another Emotional Clearing workshop. It will be here at my house in late March.
I feel that there were many others at the conference who felt it was going to be pivotal to their next step. Like me they too will carry on with what they have been doing until that next step shows itself. As David Childress reminded us during the 2012 Panel, before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water; after enlightenment chop wood, carry water.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Full Moon Effects
Yesterday was one of those days that just leave you shaking your head. Woke feeling on the verge of tears and that stayed with me most of the day. A friend reported feeling very irritable. It was a full moon last night and one of the brightest.
Personally, I think the moon just exacerbated any feelings that needed to be expressed but were being suppressed. I've ended my 9 month relationship with a wonderful man and have been struggling with it. We were good together with, as he said, 80% of our relationsip working but the other 20% was the problem. Normally, a couple can overcome such a small percentage, but not when it consists of things upon which a relationship's foundation is built. I'm so missing that 80%.
Personally, I think the moon just exacerbated any feelings that needed to be expressed but were being suppressed. I've ended my 9 month relationship with a wonderful man and have been struggling with it. We were good together with, as he said, 80% of our relationsip working but the other 20% was the problem. Normally, a couple can overcome such a small percentage, but not when it consists of things upon which a relationship's foundation is built. I'm so missing that 80%.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Early Spring?
Woke up this morning to find that the last of the snow is nearly gone. Temps are in the 40s and the sun is finally peeking out from behind the clouds. Also notice that the daffodils are popping out. Does this mean an early spring? If time has sped up perhaps spring has done so too. What's your thoughts on it?
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Arctic Blast!
Snow in January is nothing new here in Kansas City, but having it linger for over 2 weeks is. And the below freezing temperatures that have accompanied it are a real surprise. I've been researching why this "Arctic Freeze" why it occurred and why it just doesn't seem to end.
First, the freeze has come in what can only be called blasts. It is as though the arctic circle is belching blasts of cold air. My theory is that it is connected to the Norway Spiral that occurred in December. The official explanataion was a missle that failed. I have to concur with David Wilcock that it was a test from a Norwegian HAARP facility called EISCAT. See: http://divinecosmos.com/index.php/start-here/davids-blog/521-disclosure-endgame
This test, by the Russians and Chinese, who along with toher countries, fund this facility created a disturbance much like a hole in the atmosphere over the artic circle. Now, I'm not a scientist so I cannot give you the scientific explanation.....only what I am getting from the Nibiruans. They explained it as a hole or opening that caused/allowed the frigid air to literally belch out of that area in blasts. These blasts are creating havoc all over the northern hemisphere. 14 states in the US are experiencing record low temps.
Another tale tale sign is the spiral form the cold air creates. When you see it on the weather map it looks like a spiral that comes down from the artic and wraps around the midwest as far south as Texas. Then it curves up around Misourri and Iowa where it curls in again.
As the fronts move eastward, they pick up moisture which is causing the record snowfalls in the East. We feel lucky here in the Midwest to only have gotten about 12". Those in the East are getting 3' or more.
David Wilcock theorizes that the reason for all this is that the Russians and Chinese are pushing for disclosure of the ET connection. That may be but does it have to involve the weather? Geez! What's your theory?
This test, by the Russians and Chinese, who along with toher countries, fund this facility created a disturbance much like a hole in the atmosphere over the artic circle. Now, I'm not a scientist so I cannot give you the scientific explanation.....only what I am getting from the Nibiruans. They explained it as a hole or opening that caused/allowed the frigid air to literally belch out of that area in blasts. These blasts are creating havoc all over the northern hemisphere. 14 states in the US are experiencing record low temps.
Another tale tale sign is the spiral form the cold air creates. When you see it on the weather map it looks like a spiral that comes down from the artic and wraps around the midwest as far south as Texas. Then it curves up around Misourri and Iowa where it curls in again.
As the fronts move eastward, they pick up moisture which is causing the record snowfalls in the East. We feel lucky here in the Midwest to only have gotten about 12". Those in the East are getting 3' or more.
David Wilcock theorizes that the reason for all this is that the Russians and Chinese are pushing for disclosure of the ET connection. That may be but does it have to involve the weather? Geez! What's your theory?
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Preparing to Forget
Went out to shovel the 2+ feet of snow and ice from the sides of my driveway this morning. The snow hasn't melted and just continues to pile up and we are are about to get hit again with another 3 - 4" --we hope that's all!. Patty, my friend who is staying here for awhile was out there shoveling with me. At one point she went to shovel a different area. "Patty!" I called out to her as she shoveled a foot of snow from around the garage door. "Would you help me finish this part?" I was at the bottom of the driveway working on the sides where the snow had piled up blocking the area where I usually drive when backing out. I had already hit that pile the day before when backing down. Fortunately it wasn't solid so it didn't do any damage to my bumper. "Why do you need to clear more of that away?" She asked somewhat perplexed since there was plenty of room to get out of the driveway. "Patty, I've hit every corner of my car getting out of my garage and driveway and each time it's cost me $500 bucks! This pile is going to freeze solid like an iceberg and I know myself; I won't remember to steer towards the middle of the drive and I'll hit it. So, I have to plan to forget. Patty busted out laughing which made me laugh too. "Can you just see it now, I went on....Bob at Santa Fe Auto is gonna say, "So what did you hit this time?" An iceberg! I'll say. I"m sure he'll get a kick out of that as he hands me a bill for another $500.
Monday, January 4, 2010
First Monday of the Year and Decade
Don't know about you but Mondays have typically been a downer for many people...I must admit to feeling that way myself from time to time, but today is different. Today, I feel so positive about well..everything. As this Monday of the year and decade commences I feel as though anything is possible and the future is bright. I think of all that I have been blessed with...a great way to get positive if not already. I have health, a warm home, the love of a good man, a wonderful family, loyal friends, sweet 4-legged friends--they are my joy sponsors--and work that makes my heart sing. Plus, the sun is shining making everthing appear to sparkle as it reflects off the 8+ inches of snow. Who cares if it's only 3 degrees outside? How can I not feel excited?
I think not only does your thoughts and actions on teh first day of the year set the tone for the rest of the year, what you do and feel on the first work day of the year does the same. What do you think?
I think not only does your thoughts and actions on teh first day of the year set the tone for the rest of the year, what you do and feel on the first work day of the year does the same. What do you think?
Friday, January 1, 2010
Avatar, the movie
The original Felines were also very gentle but could become quite ferocious if need--wouldn't want to cross them! Anyway, seeing the Nawbi's portrayed as they were, warmed my heart and stirred what felt like ancient memories.
I can't help but wonder if some of the movies coming out now are doing so because they are meant to trigger ancient memories of events long past but are being repeated now. If so, then perhaps this movie bears the message and means for how we can end the conflicts on our current world. In the end, there was integration, with the lead character relinquishing his body and fully inhabiting his avatar body. The repressors were not totally destroyed but simply sent to another world, the world from which they came. And unlike the ancient homeworld, Pandora, the name of the planet in the movie, was not destroyed in the conflict...a big plus.
What also intrigued me was how the Nawbi could sync with Pandora herself. Simply by inserting and intertwining nerve endings in their tails into tiny openings or portals in the ground they were able to connect with her spirit and energy and use it to heal or communicate. That Pandora, the planet was alive and was the mother that sustained them all was to me, one of the most profound messages in the movie. Furthermore, how the Nawbi could sync with other speciies such as the horses they rode just by intertwining and inserting the end of their tails into a similar aperture of the horse was amazing. Once the connection was made the horse and Nawbi rider became one; their nervous systems melded. The rider had only to think what he/she wanted the horse to do and it did it; no words were needed.
In my book, I spoke of remembering how I as Jelaila, felt when I would climb into one of those chamber then lay down. I had to step up a couple of steps and then crawl in and lay down on my back. I recall looking up as a tall feline looking male with the kindest blue eyes and warm smile talked to me as he gently closed the clear lid. I also recall him gently saying, "Just relax and breathe it in" as I struggled to relax and breathe in the blue liquid that would sustain my body while I was away.
As Jelaila...I was moving my consiousness between a Feline body on a ship--I recall the ship as well--and human body. This went on for over a decade as I worked on my mission here. I don't know how many times Jealila went back home during those years but I do recall remembering things from dreams that seemed so incredibly real the next morning when I awakened. One such memory was climbing out of the chamber and being greeted by Devin and Joysia. After stretching my legs, we would walk out of the room and down a long hall, discussing what I had experienced on Earth. We were heading towards a room where I would be debriefed. As we approached the intrance a door would quietly glide open. Inside was an almost oval table with a big dome in the middle that lit up in various colors. One could liken it to a crystal ball because images would appear in it and they would be coming from my mind...as if I was downloading all my memories for the others to see. There was more to this but I'll stop here.
One of my New Year's resolutions is to drink more water but I know I'm gonna struggle with that one. I notice a subtle, almost imperceptable feeling of panic when I drink water, as if I'm gonna drown. Could be a past life issue or it is the blue liquid? Jelaila really seemed to struggle with it. Back to the movie...
All in all, I feel it was a beautiful movie with many messages for us today. I hope it draws millions of people to see it and if my hunch is correct, it could have the impact on the mass consciousness that was intended. I'm going back to see it in 3D. I hear that is out of this world! No pun intended. *smile*
Grateful Thoughts
On the first day of each new year, I wax rather sentimental. Pulling out my journal from the previous year or so, I reread all that I was grateful for and all that I had wished for. If the wishes came true, I look to see if they were mentioned in the following year's notes. Last year I wished for better health, a business that continued to prosper, a way to get my family back together and a loving resolution to my relatonshiop with Jonathan, my partner of 10 years. I wished for my daugther to find her way after having to give up her dream of being a theatrical stage director, and her scholarhsip, due to health problems.
All of these wishes were granted, but as ususal, how they were granted left me with mixed feelings. My health improved in some areas...I have more stamina; a gift after years with Chronic Fatigue. My business has continued to hum along but my father's death was the catalyst for my family's healing. Jonathan and I divorced after 10 years of marriage; it was hard to lose my best friend. but we both knew our time together was at an end.. My daughter found her new dream and is doggedly pursuing it. It's so nice to see her excited again after wathcing her flounder for 2 years. So, I guess the lesson here is that wishes are granted but we must find a way to be grateful for how thyey are granted even when the means is not exactly what we wanted.
I am grateful for my family's healing.
I am grateful for my father and the love he gave me. I carry him in my heart.
I am grateful for 10 years with Jonathan and that he and I remain friends.
I am grateful for the new love that has come my way; the love of a man who is honorable, kind, gentle and trustworthy, all the qualities I found in Jonathan.
I am grateful that Danielle has found a new career and a new future.
I am grateful for love and loyalty of my friends; they got me through some really tough times this past year.
I am grateful that my work is still going...that people actually want to hear what I have to say. That still just blows me away.
My wishes for this year?
I wish for even better health and the willpower to carry out my plan to attain it.
I wish for my new love and I to grow closer and that our plans to build a life together are realized this year.
I wish for my daughter to realize her dream this year with a degree.
I wish for my friends to realize all their dreams for the year.
I wish for the wisdom and understanding to continue being a voice of reason in a chaotic world.
I wish for this work to continue to fulfill the needs of those who are drawn to it; that it prosper in return.
All of these wishes were granted, but as ususal, how they were granted left me with mixed feelings. My health improved in some areas...I have more stamina; a gift after years with Chronic Fatigue. My business has continued to hum along but my father's death was the catalyst for my family's healing. Jonathan and I divorced after 10 years of marriage; it was hard to lose my best friend. but we both knew our time together was at an end.. My daughter found her new dream and is doggedly pursuing it. It's so nice to see her excited again after wathcing her flounder for 2 years. So, I guess the lesson here is that wishes are granted but we must find a way to be grateful for how thyey are granted even when the means is not exactly what we wanted.
I am grateful for my family's healing.
I am grateful for my father and the love he gave me. I carry him in my heart.
I am grateful for 10 years with Jonathan and that he and I remain friends.
I am grateful for the new love that has come my way; the love of a man who is honorable, kind, gentle and trustworthy, all the qualities I found in Jonathan.
I am grateful that Danielle has found a new career and a new future.
I am grateful for love and loyalty of my friends; they got me through some really tough times this past year.
I am grateful that my work is still going...that people actually want to hear what I have to say. That still just blows me away.
My wishes for this year?
I wish for even better health and the willpower to carry out my plan to attain it.
I wish for my new love and I to grow closer and that our plans to build a life together are realized this year.
I wish for my daughter to realize her dream this year with a degree.
I wish for my friends to realize all their dreams for the year.
I wish for the wisdom and understanding to continue being a voice of reason in a chaotic world.
I wish for this work to continue to fulfill the needs of those who are drawn to it; that it prosper in return.
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